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Conflict Resolution Cheat Sheet

Turning workplace drama into productive outcomes

Competing: Stand your ground firmly. Use when: critical principles at stake, quick decision needed, implementing unpopular necessary action.
Collaborating: Find win-win solution. Use when: both sets of concerns too important to compromise, need to merge insights, buy-in crucial.
Compromising: Meet in the middle. Use when: goals moderately important, equal power exists, temporary solution needed, deadline looming.
Accommodating: Yield to others. Use when: issue matters more to others, preserving harmony is priority, building credit for future issues.

Label emotions: 'I can see you're frustrated' acknowledges feelings without agreement. Magic phrase to lower temperature.
Reframe problem: Shift from personal conflicts to shared problems: 'How can we solve this together?'
Use curious questions: 'Help me understand...' invites explanation without accusation. Can't be said with crossed arms.
Take strategic timeout: 'Let's take 10 minutes' when emotions run high. Amygdala hijacks prevent rational discussion.

Prepare privately: Know your goal, plan key points, anticipate reactions. Never wing a difficult conversation.
Start with agreement: Find common ground before differences. 'We both want this project to succeed...'
Use 'I' statements: 'I noticed/felt/observed...' not 'You always/never...' The latter activates defensive shields.
Propose next steps: End with clear actions and agreement. Without this, you've just had a nice chat about problems.

Establish ground rules: No interrupting, focus on issues not personalities, shared commitment to resolution.
Active listening loop: Each party states their view, other repeats it back accurately before responding.
Look for interests vs positions: Move from 'what they want' to 'why they want it' to find creative solutions.
Document agreements: Write down what was decided, have all parties acknowledge it. Memories are creatively selective.

Address conflicts early - they rarely improve with age
Remember that most workplace conflicts are about roles, resources, and miscommunication, not personality
Take disputes to the lowest possible level before escalating
The goal isn't to eliminate conflict but to harness it for better decisions and innovation

Workplace conflict is like kitchen leftovers - address it when fresh, or it grows into something unrecognizable that everyone avoids opening.

Life's too short for boring management. Make it count.

Management Master™

Pro tip: Pin these cheat sheets to your office wall or slip them into your notebook for emergency management situations.